How to Tell Your Boss You're Pregnant
Telling your workplace you’re pregnant can be scary! In fact, 21% of expecting parents are worried about telling their boss they’re having a baby, according to a 2018 study. Part of the worry is simply not knowing when or how to tell your boss you’re pregnant. While there are no hard-and-fast rules that dictate the ideal time or words to share your news, we’ve got some helpful tips to follow that’ll make the process way less stressful. Here, the guidance you need for telling your boss you’re pregnant.
When to Tell Your Boss You’re Pregnant
Technically, you don’t have to share your “I’m expecting” news with your boss by a specific time. Of course, that doesn’t mean cutting it that close is the best move! You should give yourself—and your team—time to prepare for your leave. Plus, once you spill the beans, you can be up front with your colleagues about needing to leave for prenatal visits. That’s why folks often tell their boss they’re pregnant around the end of the first trimester, when they may be starting to show—and the risk of miscarriage goes down. But, again, that’s not a rigid rule.
Should I tell my boss early that I’m pregnant?
To determine if you should share your pregnancy news early, ask yourself the following questions:
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Do you have significant morning sickness?
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Are you experiencing extreme fatigue?
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Will frequent doctor appointments cause issues at work?
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Are you sharing your news with coworkers or folks on social media?
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Does your job require strenuous or hazardous work?
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Does your job put you in close contact with potentially harmful chemicals?
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Do you need accommodations?
If you answered yes to one or more of these questions, you may consider telling your boss you’re expecting sooner rather than later.
Is 20 weeks too late to tell your boss you’re pregnant?
No! You can share your pregnancy news whenever you feel comfortable. For many expecting parents, it’s better for them to tell their boss they're pregnant in their second trimester. If you answer yes to any of the following questions, you might want to wait until the 20-week mark or later, too:
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Have you experienced a pregnancy loss in the past and feel uncomfortable sharing too soon?
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Are you still adjusting to the idea of being pregnant?
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Are you up for a raise or a promotion?
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Are you set to have a performance review shortly?
If you’re on-edge about revealing your news, it’s perfectly okay to take your time sharing. In the end, figuring out when to announce your pregnancy to your boss is a highly individual decision.
When should I tell HR I’m pregnant?
You can chat with HR after you talk to your boss or beforehand, depending on your situation. HR will be able to fully fill you in on the ins and outs of your company's parental leave policies.
How do I tell my boss I’m pregnant?
Telling your parents and your BFF you’re pregnant is not at all like sharing the news with your boss—no cute ideas necessary! Instead, you want to be prepared and professional. To help, follow this “how to tell your boss you’re pregnant” advice:
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Tell your boss before colleagues. No matter how much you adore your “work spouse,” it’s always best to share your pregnancy news with your boss before you tell others in your workplace. After all, you do not want your supervisor to learn you’re pregnant through the workplace grapevine. The exception: If you have reason to believe your boss won’t be supportive—or will take your pregnancy news badly—consider speaking to a trusted HR colleague before sharing.
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Put yourself on your boss’ calendar. To guarantee an uninterrupted chat, consider scheduling a brief meeting with your boss to share that you’re pregnant. Depending on your workplace, a more casual office pop-in with a “do you have a few minutes?” can be just fine, too. (If possible, pick a day and time that’s quiet.)
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Have an in-person meeting. If you work in the same office, it’s best to share your pregnancy news face-to-face. If that’s not possible, consider a Zoom call. If neither are possible, over the phone is acceptable.
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Anticipate specific questions. Run through what your boss’ questions might be—and be prepared to have answers. For example, if your boss asks about parental leave, you can say, “I have some initial thoughts, but would love to schedule a time to go over the details in X weeks.”
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Jot down your own questions. If you’re unclear on your company’s policies or processes-— like who you should meet with in HR regarding your benefits—come prepared to ask about them!
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Keep it brief. During your “I’m pregnant” meeting you do not need to delve into your maternity leave plans or the details of who will be taking over your responsibilities. You can nod to those points, but it’s best to schedule another meeting to dive into the nitty gritty later.
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Get a follow-up meeting on the books. Mention that you’re already navigating the particulars of family leave and that you’re eager to have a plan in action. “I’d love to schedule another meeting where we can look over some concrete details about timing and who’ll cover for me.”
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Talk about confidentiality. If you’re not planning on sharing your pregnancy news with your coworkers just yet, let your boss know so they don’t accidentally announce your pregnancy during the next staff lunch. Try saying something like, “I wanted to share my pregnancy news with you as early as possible, but I’m waiting to share with the rest of the office.” Or “I wanted to share my news with you first, but I’d love to tell my team myself down the road.”
Sample Scripts for Telling Your Boss You’re Pregnant
Finding the right words to tell your boss you’re pregnant can be tricky. To help, familiarise yourself with the following scripts. Remember, there’s no need to memorise these “how to tell your boss you’re pregnant” scripts word for word! Read, ponder, and tweak to fit your specific workplace vibe.
I’m expecting and due in XX month. I’m set to talk to HR to discuss my options on XX date, so once I know more we can start planning!
I am happy to share that I’m expecting! The baby is due in XX month. I know we’ve got plenty of time, but I’d love to start figuring out my maternity leave and return-to-work plan soon! I don’t have many details yet, but I look forward to starting an open dialogue on the process.
I’m pregnant and due XX month. In the next XX weeks, I’d love to put our heads together so we can prepare for my absence and return to work.
I’m thrilled to announce that I’m pregnant! The baby isn’t due till XX month, so we have a lot of time to plan. I’m just starting to pull together notes on my tasks and responsibilities, so we can devise a plan for my leave—and a smooth return.
I have some personal news. I’m pregnant and due XX month. Soon, I’ll have more info to share about my parental leave and work coverage plans. But for right now, I just wanted to share my that I’m expecting.
I wanted to let you know that I’m expecting. After the baby arrives in XX month, I plan on taking some leave and then returning to work afterward. I’m working on a plan now and will circle back in a few weeks with more details to go over.
I have some exciting news to share! I am expecting a baby on XX date. I've reviewed our parental leave policy and am working on a plan. We have time to delve into the specifics and logistics, but I wanted to let you know that I’m already on it!
I’m excited to share with you that I’m pregnant and due in XX month. I’ve already given some thought to coverage while I’m away. In XX weeks, can we get together and discuss?
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